It’s the last dance of the season and time to leave Kellerman’s until next summer. I don’t mind. There is something about September that is very New Years to me. I always think of that line in You’ve Got Mail that said “fall makes me want to buy school supplies and i would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew where you lived” - that is how I feel about fall. It’s time to dig out the notebooks and wear jeans again.
I love change. Changing of seasons. Changing my mind. Changing my sheets. Changing my clothes. It means things are fresh and new and I am here for that.
Since February 2020 I have run 4 tours with over 300 fabulous folks embracing change as it relates to their self loyalty. I designed, branded, sold, and launched each tour. I wrote (co-wrote in Bewitched) over 120 prompts and read every post and comment in 4 different groups. I also worked part time at a vintage store through half of it, sourced and flipped vintage to pay for my redecoration, saw clients one on one, had a major surgery and I am responsible for every single thing in my life from cat litter to cleaning to groceries. Such is life living in one of the worlds most expensive cities while embracing a community care business model because i believe that “self development” should be accessible to all and I am over the more you pay the more you get mindset of the wellness industry. Every tier I (we) launched got the same content and accessibility and I am really proud of that and all of the work I have done in the past year and a half.
Your mama cat is TIRED though. That is a LOT of kittens.
From 2015 and the fire of that and the years of survival after and the months since Covid.
I am giving myself a birthday gift of a few weeks off starting next week. First I have to deep clean my house because its pretty gnarly in here and I finally got my dream rattan shelving unit but have had no time to vignette it and my living room floor is full of plants and smalls and coffee table books. Then I have to dig out my inbox which is a nightmare and I won’t be able to relax until I do both.
After that? If you need me I will be lounging on my glorious velvet sectional, in fabulous light, admiring my gorgeous vignettes and talking to my plants.
I am also going to squeeze Lola’s tiny skeleton and use her as a pillow as much as she will let me. I plan to soak up as much sun as possible from my deck before rainy season hits and I might book a facial and read some trashy bodice ripping romance novels and re-watch Yellowstone before season 4 starts and play with all my makeup and take long baths and paint a wall in my bedroom that specific green that is in the centre of a peacock feather. I am going to move my bed to the other wall so I can chat better with mama moon and wake up and see trees instead of my concrete balcony wall and I will watch hours of TikTok and pin like its my job. I will book my pap smear because I am due and I will vote for Jagmeet Singh because those are important but other than that there will be no deadlines.
I have some new work in the works and some older work that I want to revisit and update and if I feel like it I will noodle on that because there is so much ease to a slow creative process and it is fun for me to discover what it looks like and when is the right time and exchange secret messages with Isabel. I might try to socially distance see some friends but we just had a giant anti vac/anti mask covid denying rally here yesterday so while I have remained masked and sanitized and 6ft away from people forever I will be extra vigilant about that again.
And finally I will turn 54. Which I can hardly believe because I feel 104 and 24 all at the same time and such is life and what the fuck is time and what does ageing even look like anymore?
It looks like me.
Beauty and madness and brilliance and angst all in one slightly neurotic, cynically optimistic, hilarious and petty, sexy middle aged woman who found the good life. You know…the one they tell you about. The one that comes after. After the call, the loss, the sadness, the disappointment or the dismissal.
I am in the after and it is wildly enchanting.
Live wild. Stay gold.
Thanks for hanging out with me.
Renee xx
PS -if you want to support your mama cat in these few weeks off I will lovingly accept it.
This is day 2 of Effy Wild’s September 2021 blogalong.